03 March 2010

Purple Dress, Blue Tights, Red Couch

 

 I had some fun this afternoon while The Boy was playing in his studio.  I'm so in love with our new red couch, and felt that my candy-colored outfit would look perfect against it.  Obviously.  As a coworker said today, "That's a color combination one would think would not work, but it totally does."  It's a little talent I have that really has not translated to anything beyond what I wear and what I have convinced The Boy to let me do to the walls.  I had a great teal-blue office with highlighter yellow accent walls.  That may sound crazy, but fuck it was gorgeous.  Too bad it was only mine for three weeks.  I enjoy thinking that someone had to inherit that.  I need to find a teal dress and some nice yellow tights to make me happy again.

Tomorrow I get to join my favorite gaysians for more of the best meat in town.  The weather will actually be warm this time, so it is my hope that we can sit for more than five minutes while enjoying our meat.  Let the meat-in-my-mouth jokes commence!  Don't be jealous, you can come visit me anytime between Wednesday and Sunday for the awesome fatty-brisket-in-your-mouth experience.  Oh, that just made me think how my favorite food stand will be open during SXSW.  I can't even remember what it is called, though I ate there like five times in one week last year.  It is a food trailer parked in some random parking lot, and shit damn, tasty fucking food--I believe it is some kind shwarma.  

It only took one sentence: "Tonight I'll be singing Eyes Wide Open by Creed" and I changed the channel.  Thanks for giving it to me straight American Idol!

Here's to another term with fuckface Perry.  At least I didn't have any other expectations.  Billy White there will be creamed, and life will go on as his for the past 9+ years.  Sigh.  I do wish when he decided to run a third term, he chocked on a pancake-and-sausage on a stick, which should make even Republicans a bit too embarrassed for the guy.  By the way, I have a box of those in my freezer (thank you, Kiki!) leftover from the urban-family get-together.  If Perry is feeling a little peckish, I am able to offer him a delicious treat.

At my office, there is a small department of five men and one woman.  They do something highly specialized and get paid over six figures for it.  They have master's degrees and other advanced certificates and whatnots.  Seems ex-cop went to my boss with some dumbass question, and he started it off by asking if the lady in this particular department was the department's administrative assistant.  Nice assuming, guy.  In actuality, they are perfectly capable of working without an administrative assistant, and she is the next in line to run the department when the current head retires in a couple of months.  Ex-cop is such a fucking cop.  Is she the admin assistant?  Jackass.  She could totally smack his shit up with the knowledge she has in her tiny trim left ass cheek.

Speaking of butts, today I kept catching glimpses of people's pants caught in clenched ass cheeks.  Why do people with extremely flat asses always stand in a way that their pants get pinched in their cracks?  My ass is so round, that not much stick to it without just rolling right off of it (though, skirts really like to get bunched in my crotch when I walk, even when I wear slips, which is supposed to prevent this).  However, I still (or at least I hope), I don't take advantage of my bubble ass to stand with it clenched.  That's just not necessary.

Oh, Ewan and Olivia, why the fuck did you work with Roman Polanski?  My respect for the both of you has just plummeted. 

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