Then She Said, "You can't really prevent pregnancy."

My shoes arrived!  I love them.  Such a lovely Monday gift.  I would like to receive a pair of shoes every day.  Not that I have anywhere to put them, but I can still have my fantasies.

This past weekend we ran ET down town to help with a Great Urban Race clue.  The day was beautiful and in the 80s--when we came back home I bathed him in the front yard and let him wander around a bit eating grass.  He seemed so happy.  I cut some grass with scissors around the mailbox where I have some bulbs planted (I have no idea what type of flowers they are--they were given to me).  The Boy cleaned out the gutters.  It was all very domestic.

Today The Boy sent me an email saying that ET was farting up a storm.  Coincidentally, so was I!  We are farting machines!  I need to stop eating fiber bars in the morning.  Makes me so gassy all day long.  Ahem, moving on.  The thing is, ET seems to be having some serious digestive issues.  The Boy was not exaggerating the excessive farting action.  Suddenly, he shot out this substance that looked like congealed egg whites.  Seemed to be about two tablespoons worth.  I touched it!  Solid like gelatin.  Totally wiggled.

Time out: Am watching last week's 16 and Pregnant, and this stupid motherfucking girl (Texan, of course), who said, "You can't really prevent pregnancy."  Thankfully her friends immediately jumped down her throat about the exact ways you can prevent pregnancy (abstinence was not even mentioned!).  This was the pregnant girl's friend.  Then the dolt gets defensive and says, "Like, if you're having sex, so you can't, you can't really..." There goes the smackdown again on her.  Geezum crow.

Continuing: ET doesn't seem too upset.  He wants to eat.  He is moving about and watches what I'm doing.  If more congealed egg-white poo comes from his cloaca, I will get him to the "exotic" pet doctor.  ET will probably poo and pee all over the vet.  He gets excited like that.  I have yet to find anything online regarding "tortoise stool gelatinous." 

Driving home from a very long work day (an all-day meeting!), NPR had a story about the changing technologies at college.  It made me so jealous.  I so wish I could have my professors' lectures online to download to my iPod to listen to when ever I needed a refresher on what was said.  Hell, I was jealous of how people four years younger than me were all taking laptops to class.  I abhor taking notes.  My hands can't handle it.  Stupid joint problems.  Even though I am full of bitter resentment over those lucky college-going bastards, I am happy that they have tools to actually retain information better.  Good for them.