15 April 2010

We Already Do Something Together...It's Called Work

Oh, Phil Hartman, you are missed.  Thank you for your fine delivery of that News Radio line.  It makes a good motto to have stitched on a pillow to place in my office chair, or a cross-stitched sample to hang above my monitors (yes, plural!).  I can point to it the next time Ex-Cop gets all pissy when I decline to go to lunch with them.

I was doing something mildly naughty this afternoon.  I felt the need to tell someone lest the naughtiness ate me up and made me do something stupid.  I turned to Fink-Nottle, who often is my guide in life.  This is the result of our chat:

Fink-Nottle:    you don't want that to happen
Fink-Nottle:    you want some involvement in the adoption process
Fink-Nottle:    you want to pick it out
Fink-Nottle:    and meet it
Grumples:    no, i really don't
Fink-Nottle:    really?
Grumples:    the Orange Lover was picked out without my input
Grumples:    (look, a good thing my parents did!)
Grumples:    the problem is, i CANNOT and WON'T go to a shelter
Fink-Nottle:    ah
Fink-Nottle:    because it's awful?
Fink-Nottle:    and you would leave with ALL the kitties?
Grumples:    CORRECT
Fink-Nottle:    and several dogs even though you hate dogs?
Grumples:    every single one of them
Grumples:    i don't HATE dogs
Fink-Nottle:    and maybe a couple of bunnies?
Grumples:    i like small dogs
Grumples:    all the bunnies
Grumples:    not just a couple
Grumples:    and some ferrets, too
Grumples:    i wouldn't mind a walrus, but they may not have one at the shelter

Isn't it sad how I'm calling these posts in lately. Using my work IM conversations to entertain the masses.  It's just that I have spent my week high on drugs, and sadly, I can't remember any of the conversations I have been having with myself.  There was a cat adventure today with my co-worker and her daughter who hadn't really thought her plan through.  I'll skip the story, and just say, I held a beautiful cat today who was either hot with a fever or his balls were about to explode little kitty semen all over the place.  He actually belongs to some college co-op house, and we returned him. I hope he is just really randy, ready to put those massive kitty gnads to some bad business of making more street kitties.  Come on dumb frat boys--at least take the cat to the vet and get him fixed already!

The Boy is attempting to use the mega-super pet brush with the best name ever (Furminator) on the cats.  Mattress is a bit bipolar and gets hissy angry and bites at your wrist when being brushed but as soon as you stop, he starts rubbing himself all over you and meowing endearing lovey bits.  The black Bear cub felt hiding under the couch was a better idea.  However, Whoopis agreed to be deshedded (yes, I'm aware that the Furminator basically is shaving the undercoat, but still it removes a lot of hair).  He also felt it was a good idea to groom my hair after The Boy finished brushing him.  Equal love around here.  Though, Whoopis just licks my hair up and swallows it like spaghetti, at which time I have to pull it out of his gullet and make a mental reminder to take a shower in the morning.

I have an all-day meeting tomorrow, but am skipping out for a couple of hours to tutor my sixth graders.  I'm not sure if all that really warrants a shower.  I'll know in the morning if it is right for me.  Obviously I will keep you all posted.

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