Shut Up!

Oh. My. God. Will someone please shut Zooey Deschanel the fuck up? I am innocently sitting here watching Project Runway and this commercial starts belting out this horrible music, and I immediately knew I was being assaulted aurally by the voice of Zooey D. Ok, I accept that she is pretty, and that her eyes are miniature marbles of sea worlds. I get it. I really do. However, this does not make her a good singer. Her music horrifies me, which I know is making some of you very sick to your stomach that I will say this blasphemy out loud. In 2008 I was at an all-day show in which she was featured. I went and stood in a very long line the to the port-a-potty instead of sitting and listening to her wavering I-wanna-be-country voice and her I'm-so-cute act. Argh. Her time should have been donated to Noah & the Whale so they could have a second set of awesomeness in their blue polyester pants and yellow shirts. Now she is a shill for Cotton (you know, the fabric of our lives). Sings a whole damn song about her feelings toward cotton, while she wanders around in cute outfits and tries on some clothes. Bitch.