25 September 2010

Not Showing My Tits for a Free Drink

Oh, yesterday, how fucked up you were.  It was an extreme mix of good and bad.  As a result of yesterday's fiasco of mind-breaks, I decided to dial down my Celexa back to 60mg.  If that doesn't make my mind act better, then I am at a loss of what else to do with myself. 

I finished a large project at work right at the last minute (I actually had permission to turn it in on Monday or Tuesday, but I was damn committed to getting that fucker done on time).  There was a group lunch to recognize our "hard work" over the year, and I got eight hours of recognition leave (must spend that day drunk).  Had some awesome cheesy goodness and some doable coworker small talk.  I never turned on the lights on my side of the office, and Ex-cop was only around for maybe an hour--the rest of the day was spent totally by myself.  I rocked out to my music (singing, ass bouncing, etc.).  That kind of day is just unheard of for me.

Then it all kind of went wrong for a bit.  My taillights stopped working, I lost my security badge, and the worse, oh fucking man, the worse.  I went to get some beer for CSP and me, ordered it, made fun chats with the bartender ("Hell no that pale ale isn't for me!"), avoided looking at the creepy dude sitting near the bar who kept making eyes at me, started grabbing my card from my pocket to pay for the beers, and I didn't have it!  No, I had nothing.  No driver's license, no card, no cash.  I vaguely remembered putting these items back in my wallet at work.  Then dropping my bag off in the car. 

I had just ordered beer and had no way to pay for it!  Mortifying.  Humiliating.  Shameful.  CSP had to pay for it, and that was so not my plan.  I swear it was not my plan to get free drinks by pretending to be that ditzy girl who just happened to forget her money.  I generally don't have to go through such machinations to get a free drink; I can usually just get away with, "Hey, buy me a drink, please!"  If I did have to convince someone to get me a drink, I'd prefer to show my breast than pretending to be a total idiot.  Poor CSP didn't get to see my tits, and had to pay for my drink.  All I can say for the zillionth time, I am so damn sorry.

The badge turned up and my taillights are magically working (I take this to mean my car is more sentient than I give it credit for since it was desperate for an oil change, tire rotation and air-pressure check, and having no taillights certainly did get me to the garage to do all that).  I even found $2 to give to CSP.  Must find more cash. I even saw a rainbow. 

Hooray for it all ending well.

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