1/8/10 (Yes, I know, I have the creepiest skinny arms ever.)
The Boy and Wikus got one, too (on the underside of their wrists versus the top--they have more free skin than I do). It was a great bonding experience, and I have the best tattoo artist ever, so it was a very good two hours for us.
Obviously it has been a hard weekend. The Boy got to go record but it wasn't as fun for him as it usually is, but at least he got out of the house. I drove Wikus around doing chores, but that was too depressing. Tedious work is not a great way to get away from one's thoughts. It hasn't all been bad. The Boy and I are being so kind to each other--more so than we probably ever have in our past. My little Orange Lover's death has given us a new-found respect and a well of gentleness for both of us. We can tap in to our patience a bit easier.
I downloaded the photos off my camera yesterday, and found some that The Boy took of the Orange Lover trying to steal my Christmas ham. So fucking cute, and damn did I cry. It was taken 11 days before his death, and I just had no idea what was around the corner when I was letting him nibble on the ham. At least he got some tasty ham before he had to go. That's pretty cool.
Driving through Wikus' neighborhood is particularly depressing because all the utility poles are covered in lost-animal signs. Where I live in Texas has an interesting dichotomy of people who are straddling the line of wanting to be urban-country people. Therefore they live in the city but let their pets roam around outside like it is the country. Thus, a lot of missing-pet signs. It makes me so angry and sad. I drive around this city constantly averting my eyes to the dead cats and dogs on the side of the road (or in the middle in some cases). This is Teas after all--there are a lot of big trucks and SUVs, and they don't slow down for anything on the street that doesn't have 4 wheels (they hate bicycles with a severe passion--just read the Letters to the Editor section of any paper to really feel the hatred). Even if these pets avoid getting hit by cars, they are still being exposed to the elements and getting lost and being picked-up by strangers. Heck, Wikus and I took in the Bear, and we have no idea if he was truly homeless or just maltreated by his owners. If we inadvertently stole him, then so fucking what. We saved his life.
Constantly walking and driving by these signs has always been particularly draining on me. I have lived in this town almost 11 years, and it never gets easier to see all these missing-pet signs. I have no idea the statistics of these pets being found. Maybe people are just bastards and never take the signs down, even when the pet is found. There are always so many rain-stained, faded signs clinging to these poles, with fresh ones stapled on top of them. They flutter in the breeze and call attention to them. Yet, I've never seen anyone actually stop and look. Which isn't surprising since there are so many animals running freely around the neighborhoods. How do you know if that particular animal is missing or just hanging outside because its parents are assholes and don't bother keeping track of their pet? You get so used to seeing the animals, that it gets tiring to always check a tag (usually only a phone # with no address), and leaving messages saying, "Hey, I am with your cat here in front of this restaurant, just in case you don't know where it is." In some cases you get people who are pissed off, because to them their animal isn't lost, just outside, so why the fuck am I calling? Sigh.
I truly believe our cats and dogs have been domesticated to a point that they should be indoor animals. Especially within cities. Even our next-door neighbor keeps his very sweet dog outside for about 20 hours a day. Sure, he is fenced in, but this poor dog spends almost his whole life in a backyard. He is obviously bored, and has nothing to do with his life beside barking at the other dogs locked up in their respective backyard.
This hurts me so much. I gave the Orange Lover 19 years of the best love I could give. I am so grateful to have given him that, compared to the life that so many other people in this city give to their pets. I really do wish I could save all these animals' lives. It hurts so much to know that not only is Orange Lover gone, but how many are probably dying each day out there because they weren't loved and respected enough to be taken care of properly.
Sad.
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